By Debasmita Das
1. Please don’t be proud of any of your achievements. Are you a rocket scientist? That must suck if you don’t look younger than your age.
2. You love your friends? Make them whiter. You love biryani? Bleach it. That’s what love means.
3. This sounds more like an extortion racket: Don’t show your skin till you give us money!
4. Uff! Hide yourself but don’t. Change yourself but don’t. So much double talk that it reminds us of the boy we dumped. Or the chachi we don’t call anymore.
5. The only way women can be themselves is if they stepped out of the space-time continuum?
6. Because the people interviewing you must always smell your armpits before they look at your qualifications.