By Rhea Jordan
Inspiration comes from people who work hard enough to win Nobel prizes, people who raise money for charity for different causes, people like Mother Teresa, Mahatma Gandhi, also the one too many soldiers who gave up their lives to fight for this country. Inspiration comes from people who do good in the world and magically combust, or people who walk on the moon and climb Mount Everest. I wish I could be inspired by such great people, but all they do is make me feel content that I live in such a world where everything is possible, even flying for instance. Everyone aspires to be one of these people, but my reality is different. The only person I dreamed to be like is my mother.
She had her bad days, never completed her education, she’d drink, she’d smoke, she’d sometimes get into my clothes too, she had 21 tattoos and a whole lot of scars from mutilation, she was a rebel, she never had a permanent job. But my mother was one of a kind. She taught me to believe in myself: “Never is it important to fit in, its okay to stand out, and enjoy the view,” she’d say. There have been days where we never had any money, not a rupee at home to eat. “It’s okay”, she’d smile reassuringly, “at least we have each other.”
Suzette Katrina Jordan was my Mama’s name. She had her own perspective, her own logic as to how life should be lived. She was incontestably stubborn and unbelievably broad-minded. She believed in being real, like the beauty of waking up at noon and looking ugly from the smeared makeup, she believed in the twinkle of someone’s eyes and the glow on their faces, when they spoke of something they loved, the truth, like a visitor at our place and their reaction to an untidy house and an unmade bed, or a sudden skip of a heart beat when the favourite character in a movie died. My Mama taught my sister and I to live for the small moments, moments like our first kiss, the adrenaline rush during a thrilling moment. She taught us to work hard just to be Able enough to fight this world. She taught us that no work makes you big or small, and no job defines you. Mama taught me to stay humble, “No matter how much money, pride or ego we have, all our coffins are made the same size.”
Words fall short and pages less, to describe the woman I was brought up by. She was the only person I know who has from the beginning till the very end been true to herself, and learned from her mistakes, even though she made one too many of them. She showed me that no one is perfect, and that we shouldn’t judge anyone. Sure my mother taught me things the hard way, but at least now I know that even when I’m all alone and have nothing, I will always have myself, the one that I’m true to and at peace with, the part of me that won’t make me feel so at a distance from myself. When I grow up I want to be like my Mother, be REAL. Would you dare to? What do you have to lose?
Rhea Jordan is a student and lives in Kolkata. A version of this essay was first written for a school assignment shortly before the death of her mother.
March 16, 2015 at 6:25 am
SumanaMukherjee very frank .poor girl but couldnt we wait for some time later .its not even 4days since her death
March 16, 2015 at 6:44 am
SumanaMukherjee What a sad event! Rajyasree
March 16, 2015 at 6:49 am
RevatiLaul such a pure, honest and heartfelt tribute.
March 16, 2015 at 6:52 am
soniabahl Absolutely Sonia and also it contrasts sharply with every single newspaper tribute that said nothing about her
March 16, 2015 at 6:56 am
RevatiLaul the formal rhetoric is just a turn off – on most days.
March 16, 2015 at 6:56 am
NishSwish So moved by the last para. Thanks for sharing this.
March 16, 2015 at 6:58 am
If I had a daughter (& if she could write as wonderfully) I would hope she thinks of me like this, with such honest love.
March 16, 2015 at 7:18 am
scharada_dubey 🙂
March 16, 2015 at 7:20 am
ikaveri annaverve Great. Thanks
March 16, 2015 at 7:44 am
theladiesfinger ______ava Suzette may not have fitted in our narrow scope of societal success but she showed it didn’t have to be that way
March 16, 2015 at 7:46 am
theladiesfinger ______ava That its ok to live differently..that we shouldn’t all be robots with same yardstick for success..bless her kids
March 16, 2015 at 7:56 am
annaverve I have two and I hope they think like this of me…
March 16, 2015 at 8:22 am
shreyilaanasuya I watched a feature on NDTV on sky here yesterday. Barely a mention otherwise, UK media’s concern elsewhere #SuzetteJordan
March 16, 2015 at 8:29 am
airplanetalk theladiesfinger Absolutely correct. We are individuals and all these ‘benchmarks’ are silly.
March 16, 2015 at 8:34 am
meeravijayann _divyac such a beautiful tribute by the braveheart Rhea Jordan, thank you Meera and Divya for sharing it.
March 16, 2015 at 8:39 am
______ava True! Created by “heads” who shape society in order to control them. Losing individuality is to stops evolution. theladiesfinger
March 16, 2015 at 8:41 am
bolger_emma Are they still blathering on about that documentary?
March 16, 2015 at 8:42 am
shreyilaanasuya was actually a really balanced piece, several activists interviewed too.
March 16, 2015 at 8:43 am
bolger_emma The docu.? The same activists have flagged imp. concerns about how their words were used, representation, etc.
March 16, 2015 at 8:43 am
bolger_emma Pretty heated ongoing debate in India.
March 16, 2015 at 8:44 am
shreyilaanasuya Needs coverage outside India. UK news v selective.
March 16, 2015 at 8:45 am
airplanetalk I am glad she had the courage and conviction to be her own person. Salute to #SuzetteJordan theladiesfinger
March 16, 2015 at 8:46 am
shreyilaanasuya No was a long news article so fairly clear and unbiased.
March 16, 2015 at 9:05 am
bolger_emma Love to read it. 🙂
March 16, 2015 at 9:06 am
NishSwish The truth about tattoos. http://bit.ly/tttatt
March 16, 2015 at 9:35 am
Brave and strong Girl Rhea! Such a beautiful tribute to Your beautiful and brave mom Suzette Jordan who was our family friend know her for ages. May Her Soul Rest in Peace. She was a real beautiful person from within who would always go forward to help people in need even if she had her last rupee. May she be in peace with Jesus Christ.
March 16, 2015 at 11:55 am
Hi personally knew Suzette as I was closely following her for an interview, but couldn’t do it properly. Still I had an opportunity to have brief conversations with her. This is probably the last interview that she gave, http://adviceadda.com/article/557-last-interview-suzette-jordan-that-was-never-published
March 16, 2015 at 2:07 pm
genesiaalves I am dead. What an asshole.
March 16, 2015 at 2:17 pm
imrandar_ seriously.
March 16, 2015 at 2:42 pm
divyaspandana whn ur cmng bk divya mam?????
March 16, 2015 at 2:42 pm
divyaspandana Full Time Politics Tweets U0001f62d
March 16, 2015 at 2:43 pm
divyaspandana GargiRawat good evening
March 16, 2015 at 2:46 pm
divyaspandana Madam hows your foundation doing any new initative for farmers or common man planned?
March 16, 2015 at 3:21 pm
divyaspandana Iam waiting for you mam not only me also waiting mandya
March 16, 2015 at 3:34 pm
divyaspandana Hi Ramya…..
March 16, 2015 at 3:53 pm
divyaspandana hiiii
March 16, 2015 at 3:58 pm
divyaspandana Moms are always the best 🙂
March 16, 2015 at 4:16 pm
divyaspandana sssss
March 16, 2015 at 4:18 pm
divyaspandana Hello! Im from goa,ur my fav actrees i love ur acting..U look too cute tooo..
March 16, 2015 at 4:54 pm
divyaspandana Verry Sweet Tweet.. !! & yehhhh amma s d best !! She’s a biggg wrld inside this small world !! But the biggest wrld s .. is..
March 16, 2015 at 4:57 pm
divyaspandana hi….seewti
March 16, 2015 at 9:06 pm
We pray that your mother Rests in peace. And we the whole women section is with you. Our good wishes are with you. May the culprits have a miserable life…dont let them die…cut of their hands and legs and uproot their nails and so called organ…make them survive each day with their own wish to die and get freed from the pain…everyday..make the rascals live a miserable life..We pray for a smooth life for you…may u never ever lack finance /love or people to support you with honour /friendship.
March 16, 2015 at 11:48 pm
SoniaChopra28 Read it this morning actually. Wanted to tweet it but didn’t get the time. Very moving.
March 16, 2015 at 11:53 pm
radhakaps She was a success as a mom with a child who is smart well balanced very well written I looked to see if she was in twitter but
March 17, 2015 at 1:33 am
SoniaChopra28 Very Very Touchy.
March 17, 2015 at 1:36 am
FluidSimulator I thought it was a beautiful tribute to her mother
March 17, 2015 at 2:09 am
SoniaChopra28 Yes you are correct.
March 17, 2015 at 2:26 am
smitabarooah my sincere tributes to ur mother.who faced &averted http://rape.RIP
March 17, 2015 at 3:14 am
divyaspandana really a heart touching story
March 17, 2015 at 3:42 am
SoniaChopra28 incredibly moving. thank you
March 17, 2015 at 3:44 am
sagarikaghose I knew you would like it because you care so deeply about women & Kolkata special to your heart
March 17, 2015 at 3:48 am
Proud of you Rheaa, known you and Su very personally, been there done that and all the madness in between- Suzy is with mummy now- safe up there and smiling at you and jade, niqui and aunty; she sure taught you two darling daughters how to be women of substance, and that I have noticed ever since the day I met you both- I for one couldnt contain my tears when mum left- but I saw how well you and jade managed Suzys final journey- very proud of you and jade for that. <3 blessings and love from dad tubby and me <3
March 17, 2015 at 8:39 am
sagarikaghose SoniaChopra28 so this is Sagarika Ghose’s dream ostentatious family! Bloody dolts !! http://twitter.com/ps2860/status/577751216949583872/photo/1
March 17, 2015 at 5:18 pm
she smoked, drank, never had a proper job….if it were a guy like that, he would never be allowed to have a kid after his divorce and the mom would get the kid….looks like this woman was a total deadbeat(which is what they would have called a man who had the attitude of this woman) who should not have been allowed to have kids in the first place. Mostly, looks like she was just a parasite living off some poor hardworking, responsible guy. And her daughter wants to be like her…God save the poor, unfortunate guy who will end up marrying this girl. At least, this girl has warned all the other guys to stay away from her
March 18, 2015 at 11:39 am
“Never is it important to fit in, its okay to stand out, and enjoy the view.”
~ #SuzetteJordan http://twitter.com/bprerna/status/578158880624021504/photo/1
March 18, 2015 at 12:56 pm
“Never is it important to fit in, its okay to stand out, and enjoy the view.”
~ #SuzetteJordan http://twitter.com/bprerna/status/578178282459242496/photo/1
March 18, 2015 at 1:01 pm
“Never is it important to fit in, its okay to stand out, and enjoy the view.”
These words by #SuzetteJordan should be immortalized.
March 19, 2015 at 1:59 am
WOW Girl. You will go a long way with this spirit. Your mother has been a great teacher and you have been the best disciple and daughter any parent could have asked for. God bless.
April 3, 2015 at 6:43 pm
rupalimehra yeah, post a video which is completely unrelated just 2 save yourself further embarrassment …#Misandrist #FemaleChauvinistPig
April 3, 2015 at 6:48 pm
rupalimehra I’ll let Shobha De ether you …
http://www.ndtv.com/opinion/deepika-padukones-video-may-be-viral-but-its-pointless-751034
April 3, 2015 at 6:56 pm
rupalimehra were you always a Feminazi female chuvnist pig or did you become one after getting a job in media just wondering ??