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    Categories: News

Last Night Thousands of Witches Across the World Tried to Hex Trump

By Sharanya Gopinathan

Image courtesy Bind Trump Facebook page

Did you feel something strange happening at midnight last night? Like a rush of electricity in the air or the whoosh of bat wings or something? No? Strange.

Because on the night of Friday the 24th, at the magical midnight hour, witches from around the world united to cast a spell intended to “bind Trump”, adding to the range of ways people are attempting to resist the new US President. Happily, this was not an event open to witches alone: Wiccans, shamans, Heremeticists, voodooists, hoodooists, occultists, magicians and cunning folk were all invited to traverse borders of magical categorisation and unite against the High Evil.

Image courtesy witchboston via Twitter

Since cunning folk were invited to join, I took a quick look at the items required to cast this spell: an ugly photo of Donald Trump, a feather, a white candle with his name carved into it, a lighter, a pin, an ashtray, a Tower tarot card, and bowls of salt and water. The chant, which is open source I suppose to help witches who don’t know all their spells by heart, is fairly to the point, and the reach of its power extends to Trump’s supporters as well. It contains the words: “Bind them in chains / Bind their tongues / Bind their works / Bind their wickedness.”

Several Christian groups and individuals promised on Twitter to pray for Trump to keep him safe from the witches’ hexes. Either their prayers worked or the witches’ curse failed or both, because everybody is fine and Trump has not been bound by anything, not even sense or even the law.

However, the night and Trump’s term are both still young, so don’t feel bad if you missed last night’s hexing session. These will continue to take place “on every waning crescent moon until he is removed from office.”

Sharanya Gopinathan :