The week ahead beckons,
and we need to be ready for it to feel right.
For our specially feminist horoscopes, our resident tarot reader Madam Zeenat reads the Next World Tarot deck, which envisions a world where justice relies on respect and revolutionary love. And this week, the tarot images are by Katina Rose.
May 28-June 3, 2018
This week, Madam Zeenat draws The Six of Swords, The Page of Pentacles, The 10 of Swords, and reminds you just how important it is to stay hydrated!
Mar 21-Apr 20
This week begins with a full moon. Ram-u-kaka, for you, this is a time of peace. Your horns stay still as they glow in the moonlight. It’s like your brain has unwinded after a day of hard work. You’re in deep sleep and everything is a dream, processing everything you have seen and been through the day.
So this week, vaazhkkayil vellave, take it easy policy! (Sing with me! Vaanavil vaazhkkayil, vaalibam oru fantasy!) To help you enforce this policy, the cards have sent you The 6 Of Cups. While you take it easy, The 6 Of Cups will help you water your roots with water, attention and intention. (Seriously, don’t forget to hydrate this week. Get one of those water reminder apps.)
At work, take a step back and re-evaluate your positions and people. A lot has changed since you last took stock. Consider cutting parts of the project that are not working. Look out for people who have delivered better than expectations.
In relationships, stay closer to folks you’re closest to. You don’t want to be around people who will be taken aback if you’re in a quiet phase or even if you zone out of conversations. People who know you, won’t care less.
Apr 21 – May 21
Did you know that Taurus comes from the conjunction of the Punjabi word “taur” (swagger) and the Sanskrit word “rasa” (essence)? If you say yes, you’re a liar because I just made that up. But this is what is actually up: There’s a full moon this week. So basically, you’re a lunatic bull this week — very competitive and looking for the prize.
Your mothership Venus is in Cancer. So while you’re going to be running in the night in the fields of gold or barley or whatever, your softer side, your love and financial security will be protected by an armour. Ab khula saandh ban ke ghoomne ki permission mil gayi hai toh ab aap karoge jo marzi aaye woh. Dekho ab cards kya kehte hain.
Toh, The 4 Of Pentacles is basically with you in this rampage. All your tools will be well-honed and sharp. You will return victorious from whatever battles you pick. So basically, work life toh lit hai.
Plot twist: The 4 Of Pentacles asks you about your heart. Where does it belong? They say home is where your heart is. What is home to you? Is it people? Is it things? Is it a feeling?
May 22 – June 21
After the recent crashes, saaf safai ho gayi? Some of it just won’t go away, will it? No matter, how hard you scrub, it will stay there to remind you of where you broke. I recommend reading about kintsugi. “As a philosophy, it treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise.”
Tell us about all the new things you’re seeing in the bright light of the sun! Don’t bother with the low-hanging fruit of ideas right now. They’ll be visible even when things go dark. Go for the ones you won’t see at night.
The 6 Of Swords is here to help. She is the beginning of the end of failure. She’s safety, she’s self-sufficiency. She is the eye of the storm. There’s more storm coming but you have everything in your sight clear as daylight right now.
Whatever took you by surprise at work in the last couple of months has given you this period of grace. Prepare to win against it this week and you’ll be out of it before your birth month ends.
In relationships, you will learn how to engage with subjects that you find toxic and people who bring them up using only… wait for it… your self-love!
June 22 – July 22
Kekdajaan, because we’re friends now, I’m going to call you Keks. I’ll be like, “Sup, Keks?” And you’ll be like, “Not much, Z.” And just like every modern conversation, that won’t be true. A lot will be up, Keks. Don’t forget, I see everything. (Actually, I hear everything. Nobody told the voices that all messengers now have a video call feature?)
Sagittarius Full Moon should be an R&B song. Like a soft bass guitar with crooning voice, “It’s Sagittarius Full Moon you fool, and all I can think of is you, fool, and all I can think of is you.” Saxophone. But it’s true. You’re going to be single-mindedly going for whatever it is that you want to go for.
The 3 Of Pentacles is here to nudge you awake from your focused trance and ask you, “Yeh community center kahaan padta hai?” They ask you what are you doing to involve your people in this sprint forward.
At work, whatever it is you’re going to go after, get a consensus from everyone before you do. When you win, you’ll be a star.
In relationships, single-mindedly go after the people you love, make them happy. Not how you know to make people happy but how they want to be made happy.
July 23 — Aug 23
Get your playlists ready because this shit’s about to go down! This is the week to put your back into it and work, work, work, work. (Yes, Riri better be on that playlist!) When I say work, I really mean drudgery. Not painful and exhausting but routine. Like paperwork. Here’s a neat trick that you can use. Line up the weekly/daily tasks in a descending order of boredom and go at them. That way by the time the week/day ends, you’ll be doing the more fun tasks and that will help you have a lighter weekend.
The good news is that the cards send you Strength. Strength looks out for you and keeps you from making stupid booboos. Strength reminds you to eat well and sleep well because you’ll need to be your sharpest in these routine times. The best part: Strength keeps your head in the game by reminding you that you need to do these routine things to do the things you like at other times.
In relationships, push yourself out of your comfort zone with friends, family and lovers. Tell them things and ask them things that make both of you uncomfortable. That will teach you the zen art of radical tenderness. (Or kaboom.)
Aug 24 – Sept 22
Sabse pehle toh decisions ki dukaan ka shutter down karo aur taala lagaa do. You are not taking any decisions this week. If you really, really, really need to take a decision, set up a committee of your closest and biggest fans.
You know how in the middle of a year sometimes teachers throw a test at you and say, “The marks will be counted in your annual marks.” And then you find out that they were lying to scare you. This week is that exam. Don’t panic, you’ve seen this naatak before.
Now, prepare to deal with an information overload. Yes, lots and lots of things are going to come at you this week. Just hoard that garbage. Keep it. Put it aside. Pile it up. Don’t act on it. I like to use a whiteboard with quadrants drawn onto it. Whatever works best for you.
The 2 Of Wands is here to give you a gurumantra to get through this week. In the darkest hours of this week, at work or in love, ask yourself, what is it that is hurting you the most about where you are and what is it that you’re proud of the most. That’s it. Don’t like do shit and all.
Sept 23 – Oct 23
Zindagi raat bhi hai, savera bhi hai zindagi, zindagi hai safar aur basera bhi hai zindagi. Ek pal dard ka daanv hai, doosra sukh bhari chhaaon hai. This is the week to find that sukh bhari chhaaon. Libre-aachi, the beautiful thing about life is that things are always changing. And you, the keepers of balance in life, know it better than most.
The good thing about sukh bhari chhaaon is that you don’t need to stop working or anything. (A holiday is never not an ideal situation though.) You just need to sit back at your work desk a little, and not take the stress. Work will happen. Slow but steady.
This week begins with a full moon in the sky and the cards have sent you The Moon. Your sukh bhari chhaaon could be the pleasant moonlight under which, you can lie on the sand and look at the craters in the moon, think about your pitfalls, look at the stars and think of everything you want to do.
It’s always good to have someone with you when you’re that deeply submerged in yourself, someone who will call out your bullshit but with love, with a different tone, with an unexpected silence or just a teasing eyeroll. So allocate your free time to love.
Oct 24 – Nov 22
Have you ever played a sport? If not, this is a good week to start playing something. When I say sport, I just mean a game which involves physical activity. (So, not chess.) With Mars sitting in your Aquarius and Pluto in Capricorn, there’s a lot of your physical strength that’s feeling locked because both your planets are in submerged states.
So while your mind is busy calculating all the possible ways in which the various moving parts of your life are going, your body is still. All your mind’s work needs to feel rewarded by some pleasure hormone release. I recommend sport rather than solo workouts because your competitive spirit also needs to feel rewarded right now.
The Page Of Pentacles is here to supplement the dopamine and serotonin release by helping you see all the roads you have lying ahead of you. Think of this as you’ve done all the homework you need to do but you were just not able to make the choices. Now, with a surge of adrenaline and happiness, you’ll have the confidence it takes to make the choices you need to make.
This works for both work and personal life. If you’re feeling healthy and lucid, you’ll be able to help everybody around you better.
Nov 23 – Dec 21
With Jupiter in Scorpio, you will feel very vulnerable. Every the smallest of slights against you or someone you love will feel like someone dropped a bomb. Everything hurts more. By everything, I mean everything. Even your attacks will be stronger. So be careful.
Sometimes, we can’t afford to switch ourselves off to stop ourselves from causing or feeling pain. Work and relationships come in the way. Sometimes, there’s always something that needs to be done. To pay bills and rent. To help a friend. It’s alright. Prioritise and work on stuff that is urgent. The rest can wait a week.
The amazing thing is that the cards have sent you The Queen Of Wands. She will enable you to see what obstacles are imaginary and what obstacles are real.
At work, let The Queen Of Wands do her magic. She will ignite the last barrel of passion fuel inside you and make you shine like a diamond.
In relationships, this is the week to not be what your near and dear ones want you to be. The Queen will make it easier for you to tell your near and dear ones and for them to listen to your list of everything you need to be yourself.
Dec 22 – Jan 20
Once in a while, life tosses you into a place where everything seems new and delightful. The world around you seems filled with new ideas. Like it has just rained, and the cloud-diffused sunlight makes sure you can see the real green of the trees and grass. And all you can think of is a cup of chaay and your first kiss.
You want to let yourself go and make the best of this time. To manifest into reality every idea that’s blooming in your mind garden. This is the week to experiment with that rain sounds MP3 or app that you have on your phone. Play it while you fall asleep.
Temperance is here to ask you to take advantage of these beautiful moments. Do some yoga. Find that release from every sin you’ve committed, the ones that make each vertebrae on your spine feel like a hurting lump.
Temperance will make meaningless any outside validation — from bosses to lovers to intoxicants. She will help you see past your ego and seek a deeper truth. I’d advise making something this week — a painting, digital art, a doodle, a film, a diary entry, anything. Spend some weeknights on it after you get home from work. Meet yourself.
Jan 21 – Feb 18
When you stand at a crossroads with a jar of water, travellers and commuters beaten by the heat will stop by for a drink. They will all have stories to tell, realities to share. If you’re a good bartender, you will know when to listen and when to speak. The crucial part of learning is how best to receive and give information.
With The 10 Of Swords backing you, you’re going to find yourself open to sharing your stories if it brings comfort to others and finding the right wisdom for yourself in the stories of others. Everything that you have learnt and felt from all your experiments with loss in the name of love, abuse, ethics, self-worth will come in handy.
This is going to be a social week, paani-waale baby. Listen to The 10 Of Swords. Fill up your reservoir and collect your thoughts. Try not to have that stray thought fucking with your head when you’re swapping stories with friends and strangers. It will end up with you projecting your insecurities on them. Or be upfront and name your insecurities about the subject of your conversation. That way everyone around you has a fighting chance at reaching others and having them reach you.
Feb 19 – Mar 20
Ishq samundar, dil de andar, ishq samundar! This is the week to start thinking about how to stop being a goldfish in a bowl and become a salmon traversing the distances of continents to find fulfilment in life. Or be caught and flown on a plane and served with lemon and cream sauce.
The cards send you The Star. Like she’s helped explorers of the past, she’s going to help you ease into the wide open world with a sense of direction.
This week, find time to travel. If you can’t, find time on the Internet which isn’t social media time. Go on a link-following spree. Discover new things you wouldn’t while swimming in your circles. It will *ahem* build character.
When I was questioning my resilience, I found inspiration in the tardigrade. When I was questioning how I looked, I found the axolotl — strange-looking but adorably cute with the superpower of regenerating limbs. When I was questioning my faith, I found an old Tolstoy story from my school textbook — What Men Live By. It said, “All men live not by care for themselves but by love.” And I learnt to find faith in loving people around me.
Find the story, the object, the artefact, the phenomena, the creature that most reminds you of any of your insecurities and read everything you can find about it.
(What did you think of our new specially feminist horoscopes looking into your coming week? Write to us your thoughts and we promise we’ll respond 🙂 email@example.com)