• Home
  • News
  • Longform
  • Life
    • Jeans
    • Madam Zeenat’s Feminist Tarot
  • Health
  • Work
  • Culture
    • Books
    • Art
    • Music
    • Fashion
    • Cinema
    • TV
  • Sports
  • Kranti
  • Vaanthi
  • The FAK
  • About
    • Submissions
  • Home
  • News
  • Longform
  • Life
    • Jeans
    • Madam Zeenat’s Feminist Tarot
  • Health
  • Work
  • Culture
    • Books
    • Art
    • Music
    • Fashion
    • Cinema
    • TV
  • Sports
  • Kranti
  • Vaanthi
  • The FAK
  • About
    • Submissions
HomeNewsKerala’s Fat Tax is Making Me Hungry and Diz ...

Kerala’s Fat Tax is Making Me Hungry and Dizzy

July 8, 2016

By Nisha Susan

9798045246_8961ebc220_z

So many jokes must be made about Kerala’s new ‘fat tax’ I am not sure where to start. The basics before the jokes. Kerala’s Finance Minister has just announced that 14.5 per cent tax will be charged on food from branded restaurants such as Pizza Hut or KFC all of which sell burgers, sandwiches and other non-local things that make Rujuta Diwekar cross.

Our favourite The News Minute (where we first read this amazing item) speculates that “while the budget speech failed to mention the rationale behind the government’s move, a fat tax has been imposed by countries like Denmark and Hungary to fight obesity.” Obviously, this reminds me of my father.

Once, in the heat of an argument about the environment or labour, my father, embittered by his defeat, delivered this parting shot: “No one will ever marry you… except somebody from Scandinavia.” This was admirable accuracy in placing my 23-year-old self on the political spectrum, but are we placing Pinarayi Vijayan’s government in the same Denmark of the mind?

Certainly, Finance Minister Thomas Isaac has a history of rather exciting views on development. A reliable source tells me that an anganwadi programme in his constituency had, even a decade ago, the practice of each toddler’s family taking turns to feed the rest of the class their own version of green gram payasam. It sounds like a complete fantasy when set against the newest editions of malnutrition among the urban poor in Mumbai and Delhi, where a child’s first year is often powered exclusively by Maggi noodles and biscuits.

It’s all cool for us to cite Kerala’s obesity and diabetes stats, but if you’ve ever eaten one uniyappam/one neyappam/one pazhampori, you know that no one can stop with just one. (Yes philistines at Google, we are looking at you. How could you decide that the next Android version should be called Nougat instead of Neyappam after we voted so assiduously?) You can’t stop at one unniyappam, and if you eat two you can’t even count to two. And if you eat that utterly delicious artery-clogger called a Kerala Paratha (currently being tossed up beautifully by a young Manipuri in Tiruvalla or an Oriya in Kayamkulam) you’d be okay with life itself being taxed, because sentient thought is absent post-KP.

The only thing that’s more terrifying than us fat, drunken Malayalis is the thought of carb-starved, highly-athletic Malayalis jonesing from the lack of Kerala Parathas and Beverage Corporation goodies. It’s not for nothing that Caesar worried about Cassius’ lean and hungry look.

Obviously, the new tax is less fat tax than fat-of-the-land tax. Isaac is quoted as saying he expects to raise Rs 10 crore from the tax. Perhaps a tiny fraction of the tax will be deployed to plant the thousands of jackfruit trees Isaac has promised Kerala. A delicious thought filled with chakka halwa that takes the place of any regret for pizza.

Image credit: Uniyappam Sweet & Tasty by Marvellous Kerala

Tags: anganwadis, budget, food, google, kerala, malnutrition, nutrition, obesity, Pinarayi Vijayan, Thomas Issac

Share!
Tweet

ladiesfinger

About the author

Related Posts

What Women Wore to the Women’s Wall in Kerala

In What World Is Trupti Desai the Biggest Problem in the Sabarimala Mess? A Nice Delusional World

My Family, Your Family and Why You Should Contribute to the Kerala Flood Relief

If You Want to Help People stuck in Kerala Floods, Here’s How You Can

One Response to “Kerala’s Fat Tax is Making Me Hungry and Dizzy”

  1. Reply
    JayasankarPrasadA
    July 8, 2016 at 4:13 pm

    Why put up the photo of the humble jaggery filled delicacy Unniyappam- the fat tax is rather meant for butter rich pizza etc.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Trending

Sorry. No data so far.

Subscribe to our email newsletter!

You May Also Like

  • After Payal Tadvi’s Death Can We Allow Medical Education to Continue to Pretend to be Casteless? May 28, 2019
  • Jokha Alharthi’s Man Booker Win Reminds Us of Oman’s Recent Slave-owning Past May 24, 2019
  • In Avengers: Endgame, Black Widow is Sexy, Sterile and So Burnt By Marvel May 12, 2019
  • Let Us Admit the Sins of Atishi Marlena May 10, 2019
  • 20 Questions for SC Panel that Cleared the CJI of Sexual Harassment Charges May 9, 2019


Online Bachchi, Dil Ki Sachchi

Come on over for feminist journalism.

Politics. Pop Culture. Health. Sex. Law. Books. Work.

We write what we want to read.

  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Refund Policy
  • About
  • Contact Us

Subscribe to our email newsletter!

Keep up with us!

Follow Us on FacebookFollow Us on TwitterFollow Us on YouTubeFollow Us on E-mail

Trending

Sorry. No data so far.

Copyright © 2018 The Ladies Finger
Subscribe to our RSS/Atom feed here